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Children are at an age where they need lots of love and encouragement to grow up into healthy young adults.
This is one thing I'm not afraid to admit that I struggle with. Growing up the only person who really encouraged my brother and I was my mom. My dad was raised with a firm hand and was more authoritative instead of encouraging. So I have tried to be more like my mother, but it's hard. Especially when you're stressed to your children how you expect them to act.
I have a little bit more of the authoritative way of thinking that I would like, but it is definitely something that I'm working on. I do notice, however, when my kids are encouraged, they do act a tiny bit better. Just a little bit though. They will often revert back, which is why I'm trying to make a more consistent thing we do in the home. Which isn't always an easy thing to do when you have children with ADHD or ODD. You need to encourage them to develop their own thoughts and opinions.
5 Simple Ways to Encourage Your Child
Acknowledge their efforts
- Most of the time, when we give our children household responsibilities we always forget to let them know that they have done a great job on it. If they didn’t perform their task very well, don’t go straight for the negative criticism. Tell them that they did put in a good effort and give a suggestion in a positive manner. A suggestion given in a kind tone will be taken more positively by your child.
- Sometimes a simple *high five* is enough, or even a text message saying “Hey, I saw you aced that math test you were working on, that's awesome! Great job” means the world. It shows them that you are paying attention and see their hard work.
When they have done something great, remember to thank them
- This is positive reinforcement and will make them proud of the good things that have done. In addition, you are also cultivating good manners in your children by being a good role model yourself.
- Don't just say thank you to them, be genuinely grateful for the things they help with or that others help you with.
Don't to brush off their problem aside
- How often when your children come home complaining about something, you just brush them off by saying that it is nothing? This would make your children feel that their problems are of a trivial matter and not worth their parent’s time. Next time, your children would not bother coming to you with their problem and they will try and suffer their problem in silence. Instead, try listening to what your children have to say and be supportive of them.
- Also, if you see something is bothering your child, try and find out what it is. Quite often, they exhibit off behaviors because something is weighing on their mind. Recently my son opened up and let me know that the death of my mom was still weighing in and on him and he felt that he was shafted with not having anything to really remember her by other than a couple photos.
Remember to tell always show your love to your children
- Tell them that you love them all the time. Give them a hug or a good night kiss before they sleep at night. You would want to encourage your child to grow up to be loving, healthy adults. If you hardly express your feelings to them, your children may grow up being cold and unemotional adults unable to express their feelings. Your love will provide them the encouragement they need when they are sad or feeling discouraged
Lastly, remember to encourage your child’s imaginative side by having fun
- Have activities together with them and let their imagination take charge so your adults will grow into fun-loving adults. So what are you waiting for, don’t wait till tomorrow to start encouraging your kids? Start now! Some of my favorite activities to do with my kids are board games, getting outside and working on our photography, or even doing a few of the things that make them happy.
What types of things do you do to encourage your children?
Have there been times where, no matter how much you encouraged, they still made the wrong decision?
What did you do or say?
I am a wife, mother (to both human & furry), daughter, sister, and blogger. I grew up in a semi-suburb of Cleveland, Ohio. In October 2013 I married the love of my life and in July 2018 we bought our first home in a small little country town about 45 minutes away from our hometown.
My belief is that someone is always needing a little help in various aspects of their life and I'm that chick who will help. On my website, you will find a variety of topics that primarily center around parenting teen sons, finances, crafting, DIY, food & drink, a little beauty & fashion, and I talk a lot about mental health.